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I mistyped myself for about five years. While it took me a long time, there were signs all along that Type Three was wrong.
1. I didn’t like the clothes.
The idea of doing the 30-day challenge didn’t appeal to me at all. I was never inspired by the OOTDs in the T3 Facebook group. The only T3 pattern I liked was leopard. I ordered a handful of things from the DYT store, back when they still sold clothing and accessories, and none of the clothing ever made it out of the bag. The jewelry didn’t fare much better, and a lot of time, it was literally too big for my ears, especially stud earrings. I didn’t know it was possible for jewelry to not fit, but it happened.
2. I felt like I looked different from other T3s.
I always felt like there was just something different in the way I looked. I could see some T3 features, like the lump of clay nose, but the overall quality of my bone structure and skin seemed different. I thought maybe finding my secondary would help, but I didn’t look like the 3/4s and I couldn’t see myself being 3/1 and being the highest energy on the planet.
3. I never felt shamed for what I saw as my T3 qualities.
When I read The Child Whisperer, I thought that I must have been raised very true to my nature, because I related to nothing regarding shaming of a T3 child. (The T4 child? Very much so).
4. I was not a T3 child.
Going from that, when I was very, very young, I barely moved. I sat in a chair and observed the world. I had no need to be physical in the world. I preferred to read and write, once I was old enough, and do my own thing. When it comes to being competitive, the only place I could identify being competitive was… reading. I wanted to read more books than my peers. When it came to sports, however, I would do everything I could to get out of it.
5. Being physical and active didn’t support me.
After about four years of this, it came to a point where I felt very out of sorts. I thought that I wasn’t doing enough to support my T3, that I needed to extrovert myself more (in the way Carol uses it, to describe a quality of movement, versus being more social). But I don’t support myself by getting things done and connecting with the outdoors. I support myself by making sure to give myself time to go within.
Of course, there were many ways I was living true to my nature as a Type Four, even when I thought I was a Type Three. About a year before I realized I was a T4, I got a Type Four haircut. My clothes were basically T4 in T3 colors. And about six months before I realized I was a T4, I started getting up an hour earlier in the morning to have some time to intellectually connect with my interests before my day started, because I was working retail and that required a lot of extroversion. I still do this and I find it to be the single most important change I’ve made in my life, because it allows me to start my day off in a way that supports me. This is the first time in my life that I feel like I’m not underachieving in school, and I think it’s because I have learned how to support my T4 energy in a way that allows me to live up to my potential.
So these were all the glaring signs that I had misprofiled myself. Now, I think that someone could have one or two of these present, and it could be wounding, or that they haven’t found their way of living in their type yet. But I had so many things showing me that T3 was not my primary that it just couldn’t be right. When I realized I was T4, I couldn’t wait to buy all the things, and I related so much to everything Carol says about the T4 child, and I saw how Big Picture Thinking is my way of operating in the world. I like to get things done, but I like to come up with the perfect solution to a problem, not just do things for the sake of doing things.
Even if you’re not interested in DYT, I still think we show signs of when we have put ourselves in the wrong place in any system. What have been some signs that you placed yourself wrong somewhere?
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Shawna McComberJuly 12, 2019 at 4:49 pm
I definitely agree. Sometimes putting oneself in the wrong place is due to misunderstanding the system and other times to misunderstanding oneself. Often for me it is language that gets in the way because I take it too literally. I’m a T4 but for the longest time didn’t think I could possibly be. IN some ways it’s because T4 was my idea of ‘the ideal’ type and life just doesn’t work that way, I reasoned. The type I least wanted to be as T3 or T1 so I reasoned that I must be one of those and have some sort of resistance. I still don’t know my secondary as each of them seem possible. For awhile I was convinced I was a 4/1 but I’m doubting that now. Also, I am autistic and have currently untreated ADHD so it is very difficult for me to figure out how that fits into a system that is about energy and personality. Just imagine how exhausted a T4 with ADHD is! It took me a long time to find my place in colour systems too because I am a Bright Winter and really did not want to be. I am not naturally drawn to bright colours but I cannot deny they are what look best on me. I tend to like the soft seasons and specifically soft warms but I am quite content dressing in a lot of black. Every system I have looked at has taught me something about myself. Particularly they have taught me that I do not see myself very clearly and was too inclined to try to incorporate other peoples’ opinions into my concept of my ‘type’. This had me temporarily believing I was just about all of the Kibbe types at various times too. It took me a long time to block out what others were saying and all the confusion and just look at myself and see, simply, what is there. I will never know where David Kibbe would place me but I know where I think I belong in his system and that works for me. As with the T4, I arrived in the right place after rejecting the right thing and trying everything else. I’m calling it the Goldilocks Approach: Too big, too small, too hard too soft……just right.Reply
stylesyntaxJuly 12, 2019 at 11:07 pm
Yes, T4 was my “ideal” too, and I thought that I couldn’t be it for that reason—-like if it was what I wanted, it wasn’t going to be what I am, which Carol says is common. I felt the same way about Kibbe, that no way could I be FG because I already loved it, and that I somehow had to be a different person. And for T4 in particular, when Carol says “symmetry,” we T4s take it very literally! Seeing “real” people typed as T4 helped me a lot.
Shawna McComberJuly 13, 2019 at 8:50 pm
When I tried dressing as T1 or T3 they both looked quite fake and like a costume. T2 seemed dowdy on me. I had to stare at some of the T4 faces for a long time to get over my symmetry issue because once I did that I could see that they weren’t perfectly symmetrical. Human beings just aren’t but some give that impression more than others. I laugh at myself now when I recall walking around my home trying to decide if I glide or stride.
stylesyntaxJuly 16, 2019 at 2:42 am
I still have no idea how I walk, haha! Sometimes I think T4 faces just look like an absence of the other shapes to me.
MelanieSeptember 17, 2019 at 2:52 pm
Thank you so much for sharing!
I’m into DYT since nearly 2 years now…. Started as a T2 like many but landed on T4…. I even was confirmed by Carol during a big typing session on FB….
But after some.months going all.in I felt exhausted…
So I began type jumping all over again… Landed on T2, tried 3 in between… And at some point carol reached out mentioning if I honestly can’t relate to 4, I should consider T1…
My whole randomness made sense and my flighty thought processes… The FB group is beyond awesome and I felt understood….
But again after sometime I felt off….
I didn’t feel light and fun in.the first place … I switched back to 4… To 2… To 3… To 1… And again she congratulated me kindly on being back… I did the 30. Day challenge as a T1 and it was great….
But again… After some months I feel off…
The more I went with 1 the more ii noticed my strong secondary 4 and eventually began questioning my type again…
At the moment I’m pausing my dyt journey …. I think I might be a 4 with a strong secondary 1…
I go with facial profiling first but also notice my own.overall movement….
I think I was too perfecting during my first attempt and got too rigid…. I tend to over analyze everything… Not only outer symmetry but also other perfection….
So I’m trying to trust myself… Although I was typed differently and that’s quiet hard for me…
I do see my wounding and work.through it….
I will never know for sure..
I just recently found the Kibbe system and am digging into it intensely… Hopefully my request for the FB group will get approved soon so ill gain more clarity there…
One question…. What exactly is consider being tall? Above 5,5?
Thank you so.much for sharing!Reply
It is such a pleasure seeing dyt and kibbe side by side here and reading through your awesome resources 🙏
stylesyntaxSeptember 19, 2019 at 2:40 pm
I answer your question about height in the Kibbe FAQ above. 🙂
If you’re questioning like that and seeing yourself in all the types that way, I would say you’re a 1. Probably you need the Lifestyle material for understanding your secondary to make it feel like yourself and not the generic T1.
MarinaDecember 9, 2019 at 3:24 pm
Can you tell if 1/4 could be soft classic? And if anybody knows how to find fun but classic clothes🤔Reply
stylesyntaxDecember 9, 2019 at 7:18 pm
I wouldn’t draw lines between a DYT energy type and a Kibbe Image ID. Could 1/4 be SC? Sure, it can be anything.