January 2018 archive

Don’t Be a Kibbe Masochist

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You’ve done it. You figured out your Image ID. The old-school celebrities feel relatable to you. Getting dressed is so much easier now. You see how all your supposed “flaws” are just part of your yin/yang balance.

Sadly, at this point, many people actually abandon their Image ID. They go back to something else, something that they wish they were. Why? Maybe it’s, “I don’t want to be a part of a club that would have me as a member.” Maybe once the exciting haze clears of the new discovery, you are left to go back and confront those “flaws,” to finally accept them once and for all. You may now be sure about how to incorporate your personality into your Image ID.

Finding out where you belong, and then putting yourself somewhere else, is masochistic. You are torturing yourself with what you are not. You are saying to yourself, “What I actually am will never be good enough.”

This happens to every Image ID. If you’re an FN and you’re insisting you’re a very tall TR, for instance, there is certainly a TR who is looking at all the supermodel FNs and wishing they were a glamazon. Most people have a hard time recognizing their own beauty, but they can see it in others.

Read Kibbe’s chapter on resistance to your Image ID. Recognize that no one Image ID is superior to another. Beautiful people are found in every single Image ID.

Various Image IDs on display in The Women, 1939. (Source)

Various Image IDs on display in The Women, 1939. (Source)

Give yourself a break. Recognize your own beauty and let yourself be in the Image ID that actually supports your yin/yang balance. Just remember the following:

1) There is no hierarchy. Sure, the TR chapter may be especially flowery because David is writing in part about his wife, but it doesn’t mean that TR is the superior Image ID in practice. I think any TR around could tell you about their own struggles with their self image in their yin/yang balance.

2) There is no limit to your self-expression within any ID. FGs don’t have the market cornered on punk clothing. You can express any look you want within your Image ID.

3) Being in the right ID makes your life easier! You are no longer struggling with clothes that don’t fit right because they weren’t intended for someone with your yin/yang balance.

So stop torturing yourself. Don’t think that just because it’s your yin/yang balance, it is somehow inferior or boring or unattractive. You will shine in whatever your Image ID is.

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Personality Plus: Putting It All Together

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Now that I’ve covered all six personality types from the Personality Plus system described in Clothing Construction and Wardrobe Planning, I’m going to explain how to put it into practice. It is not a complete style system the way others I’ve discussed are. It is meant to cover only your natural clothing preferences (your personality) with the rest determined by whatever other system you use. The book has some standard body-type sort of advice, but we have numerous other systems to pull from.

So what is this system supposed to help you figure out? What it is really about is listening to your own instincts and recognizing your preferences. What do you reach for, and what stays in your closet, unworn? Sometimes even things that are perfect for our Image ID just aren’t things we want to wear. Identifying your Personality Plus category can help you avoid these mistakes, and it can also help you with making your Image ID (or whatever other type you’re using) feel like your own, especially if your Image ID seems to be at odd with your tastes/personality/lifestyle.

My suggestion would be to look at your closet, and look at the things you wear all the time, and the things that you never touch, the ones that may even have the tags still on them. What are the things you reach for again and again? The point of this system isn’t to give you a makeover. It’s to work with your natural instincts, and to save you money by preventing you from buying things you aren’t actually going to wear. Identifying your own personality can also help you further develop your personal style by making your wardrobe even more cohesive.

When applying the advice from the text, I think the easiest place to start is color and pattern. Look at pattern in conjunction with whatever other system you’re using–if you’re Dainty and a 6′ Kibbe Flamboyant Natural, it may take some work to figure out how to convey daintiness in a way that works with your physicality.

As far as fabric goes, in order to find the fabrics listed in the book, I generally had to go very high end, as you may have noticed. So I would try and understand what these fabrics look like and the effect they give, and try and find their contemporary, inexpensive counterparts. You also always have to consider what works with your body. If you are Vivacious, maybe the crisp fabric doesn’t work for your lines–perhaps a lot of tight-fitting, modern fabrics can convey the same feeling for you. Just don’t go for fabrics that would convey the opposite message–i.e., flowy fabrics for Vivacious won’t work.

Accessories are going to be an easier place for all of to start in terms of adding in our personality. Just make sure everything is scaled correctly for you. An SG Sturdy is going to end up with different items than an D Sturdy.

Some notes:

-In my first post in this system, I introduced them in pairs. You will never find both personalities in a pair in one person; they cancel each other out. For instance, you cannot at once not want any attention (Demure) and then also want to always make an entrance (Dramatic).

-The instinct seems to be to want to create combinations, i.e., a Sturdy Dramatic. It is far more likely that one Personality is going to dominate in you. If you think you have two or three, I would first look at whether your style needs from another system aren’t dictating that. For instance, if you are a Kibbe Soft Dramatic, and you think you’re a Dignified Dramatic, in that case, I would say that the chances are very high that what you are identifying as the Dramatic aspect of your personality is really the Dramatic aspect of your lines.

-Don’t just look for the closest match to what you are in another system. Your personality may align with your lines–mine do! But don’t cheat yourself out of a chance to have another helpful tool by not being honest with yourself about where your actual clothing preferences lie.

-Your clothing personality may change over the course of your life. Demure and Vivacious especially are types that women might “mature” out of. Demure often ends up in Dignified as they mature and gain self-confidence, and Vivacious can really end up anywhere except, I’m guessing, Demure, since that is also a type associated with younger women (although it doesn’t have to be!). Dignified is going to be rare among the young.

If you have any more questions, please leave them in the comments! And I’d also like to announce that my next workbook is going to be a clothing personality workbook, so if there are holes you feel like this system doesn’t fill, that’s something I can take into account as I work on developing my own system of sorts.

Previously: Vivacious

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Personality Plus: Vivacious

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VIVACIOUS
gay, sparkling, lively, flighty, impulsive

FABRIC AND TEXTURE
-You’re not a tomboy, but you do like woolens that take a certain amount of knockabout wear.

-You look for materials that make up into perky, crisp outfits.

-Slinky, soft materials to some extent bother you. They aren’t in step with your pep!
-You love faille, taffeta, pique, and organdy for evening.

Moschino Printed Taffeta Mini Dress, The Outnet, was $3,095, now $928

Moschino Printed Taffeta Mini Dress, The Outnet, was $3,095, now $928

Fausto Puglisi Geometric Technical Pique  Dress, Luisaviaroma, was $1,722, now $861

Fausto Puglisi Geometric Technical Pique Dress, Luisaviaroma, was $1,722, now $861

Roksanda Barham Bi-Colour Dress, Matchesfashion, was $1,253, now $322

Roksanda Barham Bi-Colour Dress, Matchesfashion, was $1,253, now $322

-You love sweaters that don’t have to be pressed and blazers that stand up to wind and rain.

Balmain Oversize Wool Blazer, Nordstrom,  $2,395

Balmain Oversize Wool Blazer, Nordstrom, $2,395

COLOR AND PATTERN
Note: the book does not give many specifics on color and pattern for Vivacious.
-You like plaid skirts that don’t show spots.

-There will be nothing ultraconservative about your clothes.

DETAIL
-You like styles that have a direct quality–a ready-for-anything look. You don’t like the type of dress that has to sit quietly in the corner so it won’t get messed up.
-You love tricky costume jewelry and fad accessories. You’re happy when you have a drawerful of belts, collars, kerchiefs, clips, and bracelets to choose from because you crave frequent changes.

Fendi Floral Snake Belt, Marissa Collections, $950

Fendi Floral Snake Belt, Marissa Collections, $950

All My Love Hinged Idiom Bangle, Kate Spade New York, $78

All My Love Hinged Idiom Bangle, Kate Spade New York, $78

-You really prefer to wear headgear of the moment, whether it is a hood or a headband arrangement. Of course, they can’t “go” everywhere. When you must wear a hat, you feel best in ones that aren’t too cluttered with “stuff.”

-Your shoes and bags tend toward casual styles, but you enjoy novelty shoes and tricky bags too.

Sophie Fringed Flats, Boden, were $150, now $135

Sophie Fringed Flats, Boden, were $150, now$135

Marc Jacobs Bow Pumps, Farfetch, were $454, now $318

Marc Jacobs Bow Pumps, Farfetch, were $454, now $318

-In short, you thrive on endless variety.

Excerpt from Clothing Construction and Wardrobe Planning

Previously: Dignified
Next: Putting It All Together

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Personality Plus: Dignified

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DIGNIFIED
conservative, sedate, reserved, serious, deliberate

FABRIC AND TEXTURE
-In fabrics, your taste usually runs to suits of neat pinstripes, smooth serge, or firm gabardine.

Tenax Casual pants, Yoox, were $89, now $29

Tenax Casual pants, Yoox, were $89, now $29

-You veer away from the more casual, “roughish” fabrics.
-You prefer heavy crepes and velvet for evening clothes because they create a sedate silhouette.

Solace London Luna One-Shoulder Crepe Gown,  Saks Fifth Avenue, was $440, now $132-$440

Solace London Luna One-Shoulder Crepe Gown,
Saks Fifth Avenue, was $440, now $132-$440

-Filmy fabrics and billowy nets are too frothy for the serious type–and taffeta is too perky!
-You like firmness in cotton and linen weaves too.

Valentino Embellished Linen Dress, Mytheresa,  was $4,390, now $1,756

Valentino Embellished Linen Dress, Mytheresa,
was $4,390, now $1,756

COLOR AND PATTERN
-You like stronger colors because “baby pinks” and “sky blues” seem too sedate for your deliberate manner. Yet you are too conservative to enjoy intense hues in large areas. You use them for small color accents.

Barbara Lohmann Flo Open Cardigan, Saks Fifth Avenue, $1,190

Barbara Lohmann Flo Open Cardigan, Saks Fifth Avenue, $1,190

-When an entire garment is one color, you prefer to have colors that are slightly grayed.

David Meister Belted Sheath Dress, Saks Fifth Avenue, was $395, now $118.50

David Meister Belted Sheath Dress, Saks Fifth Avenue, was $395, now $118.50

-And, of course, you lean strongly to black and navy ensembles.
-You stay away from startling patterned fabrics–splashy prints and bold plaids.

DETAIL
-You will look as self-controlled as you are. You will be the formal/tailored type.
-Your clothes may have that tailored look, but you aren’t a bit masculine. You appreciate the “dressmaker” touch–beautiful, simple styling; restrained, lovely detail; and dainty lingerie accents.

-There is a look of quiet elegance about you.
-You don’t feel right about a saucy hat, studded and perforated sandals, or an extreme novelty bag. Perhaps we can say that you have a rather “practical” streak in your nature.
-Your accessories are “neat,” well styled, and more or less conservative.

Manolo Blahnik BB Pointy Toe Pump, Nordstrom, $595-$625

Manolo Blahnik BB Pointy Toe Pump, Nordstrom, $595-$625

Excerpt from Clothing Construction and Wardrobe Planning

Previously: Demure
Next: Vivacious

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Personality Plus: Demure

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DEMURE
modest, retiring, shy, timid

FABRIC AND TEXTURE
-If you are demure, you shy away from things that make you stand out. You feel safer in choosing conventional fabrics, so you usually end up in soft, plain materials.

-Novelty weaves rub you the wrong way, yet you should break away from the tried and true occasionally if only to develop a feeling for experimentation.

-Somehow, figured (patterned) fabrics can have an enlivening effect without seeming brash.

Dress

Lela Rose Betsy Metallic Brocade Dress, The Outnet, was $1,595, now $558

COLOR AND PATTERN
-You naturally turn to subdued colors–powder blue, moss green, dusty pink, and aqua. They do suit your nature better than strong colors.

-As you get older, there is the danger that you might restrict yourself to brown, gray, navy, or black. Even now you may dislike to blossom forth in color. It’s easier to remain unnoticed when you wear brown or nacy.

-That does not imply that brown and navy are not good, wearable colors. They most certainly are! But there are so many other colors that are also becoming. Besides, color prevents you from getting that “mousey” look!

-You may feel too conspicuous in gay plaids, checks, stripes, and splashy prints. But do wear them occasionally in subdued colors.

Plaid

Women’s SONOMA Goods for Life Plaid Top, Kohl’s, was $36, now $25.20

Tularosa Emma Stripe High Waist Shorts, Nordstrom Rack, were $138, now $57.97

Tularosa Emma Stripe High Waist Shorts, Nordstrom Rack, were $138, now $57.97

DETAIL
-You will feel comfortable in simple styles with soft detail.

-Severe tailoring would make you feel too aggressive, whereas fussy details would seem like too much.

-Daring, dramatic styles and color contrast in a dress would make you more conspicuous than you would wish to be.

-Select hats and other accessories that have that soft, feminine look. Your tastes will run to simple conservative styles in them too.

Betmar Dixie Wool Cloche Hat, Lord and Taylor, was $60, now $42

Betmar Dixie Wool Cloche Hat, Lord and Taylor, was $60, now $42

Anne Klein Expert, 6pm, were $79, now $39.99

Anne Klein Expert, 6pm, were $79, now $39.99

Excerpt from Clothing Construction and Wardrobe Planning

Previously: Dramatic
Next: Dignified

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Personality Plus: Dramatic

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DRAMATIC
daring, extreme, striking, unusual, sophisticated

FABRIC AND TEXTURE
-If you are dramatic, you can wear almost any fabric that suits your mood, although some sheer fabrics might seem too “pretty-pretty” to you.

-You like the novelty weaves (fabric made with a combination of basic weaves, i.e., jacquard, crepe/momie weave, pile weaves, piqué) that were big in high fashion in the late 1950s.

-The elegance, the drama, and the weight of velvet appeal to your luxurious moods.

-Perky taffeta with its sharp highlights and rustle accent your happy, brilliant moods.

Dramatic taffeta

Rosie Assoulin That’s a Blow Pop Halter Gown, Bysymphony, was $6,269, now $4,245

-When you are older and feel sleek and suave, you may turn to satin.

COLOR AND PATTERN
-Striking colors suit your extreme nature, but beware of peculiar color combinations that put you into the eccentric class!

-As you get a little older, you will have those sophisticated moments when you lean toward unrelieved black accented by a piece of unusual jewelry or a dash of color.

-You will love prints that are distinctive both in color and design.

Dramatic print

Pepin Abstract Wrap Top, Anthropologie, $198

-You can “get away with” bold, wide stripes and striking plaids.

Dramatic stripe

Vince Camuto Camden Wide-Stripe Ruffle-Sleeve Blouse, Neiman Marcus Last Call, was $79, now $41.30

Dramatic plaid

Vince Camuto Exaggerated Plaid Poncho, Zappos, was $58, now $45.99

DETAIL
-You will feel wonderful in well-styled clothes that are unusual for their stark simplicity. They seem to form a “backdrop” for your own dramatic nature.

-Fussy details would only clutter “your stage” with unnecessary “props.”

-On the other hand, you’re not afraid to appear in an extremely unusual style when the occasion demands.

Maison Margiela Velvet Midi Dress, 24 Sèvres, was $3,870, now $1,548

Maison Margiela Velvet Midi Dress, 24 Sèvres, was $3,870, now $1,548

-When you select accessories, don’t just look for any hat, bag, and shoes. You react to simple, unusual styling in them too. Many extreme hats, distinctive bags, and novelty shoes were designed with your type in mind.

Dramatic bag

Marni Pannier Shoulder Bag, Net-a-Porter, $2,390

Remember that these personalities don’t accompany any particular lines or yin/yang balance, archetype, etc. If you have a dramatic clothing preference, you can incorporate these ideas into the clothes that work for you.

Excerpt from Clothing Construction and Wardrobe Planning

Previously: Sturdy
Next:

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Personality Plus: Sturdy

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STURDY
athletic, rugged, strong, vigorous, “tomboyish”

FABRIC AND TEXTURE

-If you are sturdy, you know you feel right in rough tweeds and herringbones, but you also look good in garbardine, flannel, and serge.

Sturdy dress

Prada Beige & Green Herringbone Dress, Ssense, was $2300, now $860

-Most filmy fabrics and sheer cottons are not going to work for you. Imagine yourself twirling around in a frilly summer evening frock!

-Piqué, linen, or seersucker are much better.

Sturdy linen dress

Diane Von Furstenburg Striped Linen Wrap Dress, Matchesfashion.com, was $211, now $186

COLOR AND PATTERN

-You can wear strong colors–and you enjoy them. They suit your vigorous nature.

-Yet it’s nice to own some pastel sweaters and classics–but just for a change.

-Stripes and plaids appeal to you.

Sturdy plaid skirt

Women’s Woven A-Line Skirt, Lands’ End, $89.95

Sturdy striped skirt

Versace Multicolor Striped New York Skirt, Ssense, was $1075, now $215

-You are apt to feel overblown in most floral prints.

DETAIL

-Your dressier blouses can have simple but beautifully detailed collars–a fagoted edging, for instance. (I couldn’t find any examples of this for sale, sorry!)

-Your dress up clothes should stress simple lines that introduce some soft details.

-You can bring out some femininity without feeling “prissy”–you just want to avoid extreme ruffles, flounces, and lace inserts.

-Since you are not the flowery type, your hats are trimmed with ribbon, a perky feather, or a simple pom pom.

-Good, simple styling in bags and shoes is important to you.


-Fussy detail and excessive strappings and perforations would bother you.

Remember that these personalities don’t accompany any particular lines or yin/yang balance, archetype, etc. If you have a sturdy clothing preference, you can incorporate these ideas into the clothes that work for you.

Excerpt from Clothing Construction and Wardrobe Planning

Previously: Dainty
Next: Dramatic

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